Loneliness. Just saying the word touches my heart in a way that no other word can. To think that millions of people throughout the world are experiencing loneliness breaks my heart and stirs in me a desire to do something to help. But what can one person in this cold and chaotic world do?
A recent program on NPR addressed this phenomenom labeled "The Loneliness Epidemic". Until I heard the statistics and problems that loneliness create, I never thought too much about it. According to those who study the loneliness epidemic it is a real problem, not only in the United States but, internationally. The Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, Teresa May, has appointed one of her ministers to take the lead on issues connected to loneliness and its effect on British citizens. The former U.S. Surgeon General, Vivek Murthey, stated, "Loneliness is a solvable problem. We only need a heart full of compassion and the courage to express that." With that in mind, it is no wonder that the problem of loneliness strikes a chord in me and cries out for my action.
Loneliness kills. It is proven to be worse than smoking 15 cigarettes a day. It is worse than obesity or inactivity. Loneliness creates a disconnect from others that is stressful and unhealthy. Loneliness is not inherently natural as human beings are created for socialization and connection. Yet, many people find themselves living a lonely and isolated lifestyle.
I am not a licensed mental health provider and I'll admit I don't know the first thing about the psychology of loneliness. What I do know is that after hearing and reading a little about this epidemic, I am saddened and bothered. I could not sleep for thinking of lonely people in pain who believe that no one cares a hoot about them. I feel I am being called to react but I'm not sure how.
Mother Teresa, one of my favorite people to quote, said, "Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty." What an interesting thing to consider. We concentrate on feeding the hungry and providing clean water to the masses, but what about those who are starving from the lack of human contact? There are people who live in urban areas who have not had a conversation with another living soul in weeks, not minutes or hours, but weeks! How could this be? Surely this is not my neighbor or the lady who sits on my row at church or the elderly man on the elevator at the hospital. Am I so blind that I do not see those suffering from the ill effects of loneliness?
Loneliness is not new. Elvis sang about it in "Are You Lonesome Tonight". Who is not profoundly touched when he speaks in the middle of the song "someone said that the world's a stage and each of us must play a part. . . "? And, of course, who could forget when Hank Williams croons "I'm So Lonesome Tonight" and it melts your cold, cold heart? And an even older song, a hymn from the Bible, Psalm 147:3 reads, "He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds." Loneliness has been in existence for a very long time. But that doesn't diminish the fact that it is a fatal illness of the heart but I have hope that it can be treated. In my own simple way, I have thought of three propositions.
First, I propose that we put down our phones. I know what I am suggesting is not easy as I enjoy social media as much as the next person. I'm posting this on social media and you are probably reading this on your phone so I understand the implications. Just think about putting it aside for a few minutes and talking to a real person, face-to-face.
Second, I propose reaching out to someone who you might suspect is lonely. Consider a smile, a casual conversation, sharing a cup of coffee. It doesn't have to be a huge commitment but allow yourself to see beyond your situation and observe another human being with mercy and love.
Third, remember the Surgeon General's words. "We only need a heart full of compassion and the courage to express that." And another wise person, Paul of the New Testament, told the Ephesians, "Be kind and compassionate to one another . . . ". Taking these words to heart, I have determined to do my part to fight The Loneliness Epidemic. Maybe in some small way, I can help a person know that they are worthy and someone really cares.
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